yet *more* things i learned from reading romance novels

[crankylex]

YET *MORE* THINGS I LEARNED FROM READING ROMANCE NOVELS

21. There are roving pairs of previously gay men who suddenly decide that adding a woman to their relationship would make their lives faaaabulous.

22. Every bipedal sentient species that is even remotely compatible with humans is suffering from a serious shortage of females.

23. Even with their impressive technology, those species must concoct elaborate plots to kidnap large quantities of earth women (who are, of course, easy.)

24. Even though they've never encountered humans before, their universal translators understand English.

25. Throwing in a few random apostrophes make a name 'alien' -- my new name will be L'ex.

26. Heroines are permitted to have large busts and slim hips, but never, ever the reverse.

27. Deep space: the new frontier for vampires. They're EVERYWHERE.

28. Despite the apparently large number of catlike aliens, no one ever gets a hairball.

29. A so-so sex life will suddenly be transformed into a multi-orgasmic one by the mere brush of the supernatural.

30. Shape-shifting is quick and pretty. There is no bone crunching or fur sprouting or agonizing pain.

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Comments

[markeyisapunk.livejournal.com]

this post is awesome! I now want to see a story with all of the no-nos. except bonecrunching shape-changers. for some reason, I feel that shape changing is so fictional that the pain is just a punishment added (by we the society, and also by teh writer specifically) to compesate for the fun. so it's okay with me if tyhe shape changing is fast and pretty.

[spikesleman.livejournal.com]

LOL

I love these posts!

[grlnxtr.livejournal.com]

Ha ha! I love your icon.

[ladyvixen.livejournal.com]

I love these :)
What have you been reading lately?

[deoradhainexile.livejournal.com]

You know, it would be just awsome if there were a novle with ALL of these in it . Except for #26. That one should not be allowed ever. It's just not fair.